Grey Is The New Pink: In My Feelings



💭 MOOD: Stressed

🎧 Song: Evolved - PnB Rock Feat. Roddy Ricch


About a week after the indictment, I went with my mother and father in law to my boyfriend’s lawyer’s office. We hired two new lawyers for my brother and father in law to help them fight the case. My mother in law and I gave the lawyers our phone numbers and told them to contact us if they needed anything. A few days prior, my father in law was released from prison and then we found out he was diagnosed with throat cancer. That was hard for everyone to deal with. My sister in law and her husband worked at the shop on the weekdays and I starting worked at the shop on the weekends with my mother in law. During the time we spent at the shop, I became closer with my mother in law. We would talk often and sometimes things Kay did were exposed. Whenever someone’s significant other dies or goes to prison, things will always come out. I was making money working at the shop but with having two kids and driving to school in Hazelton, PA during the week, the money just wasn’t enough. I applied to Amazon and was hired on the spot because it was peak season, which is Holiday season. Although, the job was in Hazelton like my school the money was decent so I stopped working at the shop. Ofcourse, when I spoke to Kay I went off about what I had heard from my mother in law. He denied it and wrote my sister in law a letter telling her he felt a way about what was told to me. I would run into my mother in law at the daycare and she wouldn’t speak. We didn’t speak like that on the phone anymore so I already knew the vibes. Now, my brother has a son with one of my good friends and I call her my sister. I hadn’t spoken to her in a while but she reached out to see how I was doing. I went to her house and Kay didn’t like it, I guess because he didn’t know her new man. But the whole situation was crazy to me because Kay knows her very well and he never questions me about who I’m with or what I’m doing. It’s funny how when men go to prison they start becoming insecure because of the things they did when they were home. The kids were so happy to see her and my nephew that they wanted to come back the next weekend to spend the night. We came back that weekend and the family who I know very well was having a cookout. Even though we were there I lied and had the kids lie to Kay and say we were somewhere else. That was wrong on my part, I shouldn’t have had the kids lie but I’m speaking my truth. He hangs up, the next morning I go to visit him and he barely talks. At this point, my father in law had his first surgery and couldn’t really talk. All lines of communication had to go through my mother in law. That Monday, I get a text from my mother in law stating that she spoke with JJ (That’s what they call him) the night before and he wanted them to come get all his belongings and his chain that he specifically told me to keep for me and the kids incase of an emergency. She told me that they could come pick it up or I could drop it off at the shop. I was hurt, couldn’t believe he took it this far and couldn’t believe she went through with it. I felt like I put in all these years and me and my kids meant nothing. Overall, I felt betrayed and even if it wasn’t meant like that, I felt like that and little did I know I was going to feel like that again as time went o